crush on...

Hhhhh.... (still taking deep breath couple of times)....
when and where can I find a decent good and eligible bachelor in this universe? :/
Everytime I met one, they always turn out to be NOT single... hhhh.... why...why...
Ok, I have a confession to make... I met 2 wonderful guys lately. They are brothers and they came from a good family that quite happy and have a strong realationship towards one other. hmm, im not saying that i have a crush on them, but somehow deep inside there's a feeling of wanting to become a someone special in their hearts. isn't that crazy... remembering that they both are quite older than me... well, I dont mind at all exactly... since now I'm really outta love for someone who is UNDER 30s. Since i realize and think clearly now that IT IS BETTER to have a steady relationship with a mature guy who have already known what they wants in life and pursuing some goals by a great deal of hard works!! I dig guys who can appreciate woman as an friend, equal partner and lover (not as an object or a "bonus" in their narcisist life). I dig guys like those 2 brother (and God knows I wanted a figure like them so badly that it's frightened me...). I try to stop, but somehow I just keep on thinking of him...err, them... :)
(actually i like the older brother better... coz he's more open and easy to talked to anytime). Anyway, im bubbling now. It's 1.30 am and i'm staying at my friend's dorm tonite.. and I'm driving back... so I'd better go now... God, cleanse my mind and make it pure... coz there's nothing more I want than a sanity right now.